Dad Jokes

My Dad always had a joke to tell. Even when he was in the hospital, he kept the nurses laughing at his jokes–it was one of his gifts. June is the month to celebrate Dads and where we would be without those Dad jokes?

Why are most people tired on April 1? They’ve just finished a 31-day March.

How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.

What do clouds wear beneath their pants? Thunderwear.

What kind of bagel can travel? A plain bagel.

What do you call a cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese!

What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies!

Why did the girl bring a ladder on the bus? She wanted to go to high school.

Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? Just in case he got a hole in one.

How do you fix a broken tomato? With tomato paste.

Why shouldn’t you play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs.

Why did the whale blush? It saw the ocean’s bottom.

A cheese factory exploded in France. Da brie is everywhere!

What kind of sandals do frogs wear? Open-toad.

What do you call a herd of sheep falling down a hill? A lambslide.

What do you call birds that stick together? Velcrows

What do you call a medieval lamp? A knight light.

How you fix a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch.

Where do boats go when they’re sick? To the dock.

What do cows like to read? Cattle-logs.

The past, present and future walked into a bar. It was tense.