Redneck Christmas Gifts

Humor 1 Minute

Christmas gift ideas can be a very tricky thing!  Is this the right gift? The right size? The right color?  Will it be appropriate?  Appreciated?  Returnable?  Where can you go to get ideas?  Right here!

Redneck yeti

Portable tree stand

Stockings

Wind chime

Tattoo kit

Keyless entry

Fire alarm

And for you fellers out there looking for a special gift for the special someone…

Do-it-Yourself Boob Job

OR, if you’re really serious…a diamond ring!

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Published by pat frederick

Published

105 thoughts on “Redneck Christmas Gifts”

  4. i saw 3!!! last night!! we slept downstairs in the great room–so windows everywhere and skylights.

    TheseTruths
    TheseTruths(@thesetruths)Offline
    Wolf
    December 14, 2023 00:58

    Today: The Geminid meteor shower 2023: How to watch

    When does the Geminid meteor shower peak?

    The 2023 Geminid meteor shower peaks in the evening of Dec. 14, with meteors also visible on Dec. 13. The Geminids are expected to produce up to 120 meteors per hour at a dark site. The waxing crescent Moon won’t interfere with dark skies, making this year’s shower good for viewing.

    What causes the Geminid meteor shower?

    The Geminids are caused by debris from an asteroid called 3200 Phaethon. Phaethon’s 524-day orbit carries it very close to the Sun, less than half the distance of Mercury’s closest approach to the Sun.

    Where can I watch the Geminid meteor shower?

    Geminid meteors will appear to be coming from the constellation Gemini, which gives the shower its name. Meteors will streak out from this area in all directions.

    The Geminids are one of the Northern Hemisphere’s best showers. They’re also visible from the Southern Hemisphere, just with fewer meteors.

    The best way to watch a meteor shower is from a dark sky site, so it helps to get away from city lights as much as you can.

    Liked by 1 person

        1. For whatever reason, I was wired last night and didn’t go to sleep until at least 2 am, if not later. Maybe because the version of Benadryl I picked up at the local store was different than what I was taking before – pink instead of blue – but that’s just speculation. No Wheezer at all yesterday but he just showed up a few minutes ago for breakfast. It is clear that he is getting sicker: eye still goopy, more congestion, and getting thinner – just a matter of time.

          Liked by 1 person

            1. Yeah, it is what it is – I wish I could gather up all the strays and get them all taken care of but that isn’t possible so I hold back and don’t get too attached. – same old/same old with me – some days are better than others. Gearing myself up to make a run to Norfolk today or tomorrow. Sun is shining at the moment but it will be clouding up, with a slight chance of rain/snow later. Predicted temps for the next 10 days are still well into the 40’s during the day.

              Liked by 1 person

  9. from tcth

    dogsmaw
    December 14, 2023 2:25 am

    Michael Cohen’s lawyer possibly included fake cases in filing, federal judge says
    https://thehill.com/regulation/court-battles/4359479-michael-cohens-lawyer-possibly-included-fake-cases-filing/

    A lawyer for Michael Cohen, a former lawyer for President Trump, may have included fake cases in a November filing, a federal judge said.

    U.S. District Judge Jesse Furman questioned cases highlighted in a motion by David M. Schwartz, a lawyer for Cohen, to have Cohen’s supervised release ended early in a Tuesday filing. Cohen pleaded guilty to charges including tax evasion and campaign finance violations back in 2018 and was sentenced to three years in prison and three years of supervised release, but only spent a little over a year in prison.

    Furman noted three cases that Schwartz mentioned in the November filing, saying “[a]s far as the Court can tell, none of these cases exist.”

    “In light of the foregoing, Mr. Schwartz shall, no later than December 19, 2023, provide copies of the three cited decisions to the Court,” Furman said in the filing.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. dogsmaw
    December 14, 2023 3:35 am

    WV SoS Drops the Mother of All 2020 Election Claims: ‘It Was Stolen By the CIA’

    https://pjmedia.com/kevindowneyjr/2023/12/13/wv-pol-drops-the-moab-of-2020-election-fraud-the-cia-did-it-n4924722

    West Virginia’s secretary of state — and chief elections officer — Mac Warner came out and said what much of the nation has believed for a while.

    “The election was stolen, and it was stolen by the CIA,” Warner declared during a recent debate between candidates for the Republican gubernatorial nomination. None of the other three candidates went so far with their 2020 election opinions.

    Warner was an Army officer for years. He comes from a politically active family in West Virginia. And this isn’t the first time he dropped the “C” word when talking about 2020 election skullduggery.
    Last edited 4 hours ago by dogsmaw

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Robert Pilchman
    Robert Pilchman
    December 14, 2023 5:24 am

    https://nitter.net/America1stLegal/status/1734301106514104413#m

    🚨CRITICAL LAWSUIT — We just sued the Dept. of Health and Human Services and the Food and Drug Administration for illegally concealing government records related to the suppression of lifesaving drugs like hydroxychloroquine and ivermectin to treat COVID.https://t.co/baxvFpTQaR

    — America First Legal (@America1stLegal) December 11, 2023

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Hitlery’s class was not all it was advertised to be. the class was filmed (likely to be used next session as a cyber class), cut short every class by 1/2 an hour–the filming/journalists needed that time to gather and remove their equipment and access to ask questions to hitlery severely limited. the author of the piece said she could have gained as much from reading her memoir. the only saving grace? putting it on her resume that she attended the class.

    https://uk.finance.yahoo.com/news/thought-taking-class-taught-hillary-132045028.html

    Liked by 1 person

  17. this is rich. illegals are overrunning a town in Colorado because they heard they were plentiful jobs there—so, get this–they drove their cars there and are sleeping in them at night because there’s no housing for them. how in the blue blazes did they buy CARS? and none of the pictures look like 20 year old beaters either. the average home price in that town is like $750,000…and they’re asking for federal $$ to help their situation.

    https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-12860891/Colorado-ski-resort-Carbondale-Venezuelan-migrants.html

    Liked by 1 person

  18. vigil held outside WH by BIDEN ADMINISTRATION STAFFERS (wearing masks)

    Liked by 1 person

  24. these ARE hate crimes.

    sDee
    December 14, 2023 11:33 am
    Reply to Robert Pilchman

    but these are just vandals- not hate crimes or anti-Christianity…

    · A drive-through nativity scene at a Christian church was vandalized in New Bern, North Carolina. The vandals painted satanic symbols and vulgarities on some figures and tore the other ones down.

    · An elementary public school coach in Marietta, Georgia drove students around the area in his pickup truck instructing them to thrash Christmas displays after dark; they also created obscene displays with some of the adorning statues.

    · Two men damaged figures of St. Joseph, one of the Wise Men, a donkey and the Baby Jesus in Pearl River, New York.

    · Vandals armed with machetes damaged a Christmas display in front of a home in Las Vegas, Nevada.

    · In Manchester, New Hampshire a five-foot tall figure of one of the Wise Men was stolen from a nativity scene that had been set up for 40 years.

    · In a neighborhood near the University of Central Florida in Orlando, five statues of the Baby Jesus were stolen from residential nativity scenes.

    · In Johnston City, Illinois a nativity scene was stolen and $1,000 worth of damage was done in a residential neighborhood.

    · A figure of St. Joseph was stolen from a home in Rocklin, California.

    · Half of a nativity scene, including the baby Jesus and manger, was stolen from a Baptist church in Danville, Virginia.

    · In Woodland, California a priest discovered someone broke off a head of a shepherd in a nativity scene inside Holy Rosary Catholic Church.

    · Figures of St. Joseph and the baby Jesus were stolen in front of a home in Visalia, California.

    · Two women stole the Wise Men from a nativity scene outside of Town Hall in Stony Point, New York.

    · A thief made off with a nativity set from a home in Athens, Alabama.

    · In Sandusky, Ohio figures of the baby Jesus and the Virgin Mary were stolen from a church’s nativity scene.

    · A life size nativity scene was stolen from the front yard of a home in Fort Myers, Florida.

    · A nativity set was stolen from a Chick-Fil-A restaurant in East Point, Georgia.

    · A figure of the baby Jesus was stolen from a home in Beaverton, Oregon.

    · A sheep and camel were stolen from a nativity scene worth over $1,000 in Clinton Township, New Jersey. The vandals also damaged or stole Christmas decorations from at least six homes.

    · Eleven figures of the baby Jesus were stolen from front yards in Floresville, Texas.

    · In Daytona Beach, Florida a nativity scene was broken and strewn about a yard and street in front of a home.

    · A few nativity sets were stolen from a neighborhood in Port Chester, New Jersey.

    · At the mayor’s home in Suffern, New York, statues of St. Joseph and the baby Jesus were stolen.

    · Vandals destroyed Christmas decorations, including a nativity scene at the Rockhill Trolley Museum in Rockhill Furnace, Pennsylvania.
    https://www.catholicleague.org/nativity-scenes-vandalized-nationwide/

    Liked by 1 person

  35. “‘Did Not Attend Harvard’ Now Number One Quality Employers Seeking In Job Candidate”
    ECONOMY · Dec 13, 2023 · BabylonBee.com

    U.S. — A new Wall Street Journal survey revealed that the top characteristic employers are looking for in a new employee is having never, ever attended Harvard University.

    “Never going to Harvard has become a real ‘must-have’ trait for any employee here,” said Caterpillar CEO Dan Garner. “Honestly, unless you haven’t gone to Harvard, you really can’t even get your foot in the door.”

    Several CEOs of major companies stated on record that they have updated all their recruiting services to automatically filter out Harvard graduates. “It’s just more convenient than tossing their cover letters into the shredder,” said recruiter Kevin Montey. “Plus, they were always late for interviews if there was an east wind slowing down their paragliders. It’s just not worth the trouble.”

    While having never attended M.I.T. or Columbia also carries weight, not going to Harvard has become the hottest commodity for potential employees. “Going into the interview, I was nervous how I would stack up as a graduate of Frank Phillips Community College of Borger, Texas,” said local woman Sandra Riley. “Then I learned the other applicant for the job was a Harvard graduate, the poor guy. I knew right then and there, the job was mine.”

    At publishing time, Harvard graduates had luckily still been able to find work with a large-cap multinational company known as “Hamas.”

    Liked by 1 person





  36. OK, I saw something on Fox about this. If they turn out to need another seat, they will actually move people around to give them that seat – FREE!!!! This is fucking ridiculous!!! How about offering the same accommodation to Mom/Dads with babies?!?!?

    Liked by 1 person

          2. I wonder, tho…which ones he likes better? These kinds or those that make you spit and laugh so hard he has to come and see why?

            Liked by 1 person

  42. “A Game of Thrones”
    CLANDESTINE
    DEC 14, 2023

    ENTIRE ARTICLE: “Putin is content sitting in a heavily fortified defensive position, allowing Ukraine to run into their front, waiting until Trump returns.

    Putin does not need to advance. Why waste lives and resources, when he can just outlast Ukraine and make a deal with Trump in a year? Trump wants to uproot Ukraine also. It’s a Deep State proxy, and Trump knows it.

    In the meantime, Russia can methodically demilitarize Ukraine’s future fighting capability by forcing Ukraine to exhaust all their vehicles, equipment, ammunition, etc., while sustaining as few casualties as possible by fighting from the largest defensive front assembled since WW2, as opposed to trying to take land and expending a higher casualty rate.

    Then when Trump returns, they can make a deal to end the war, stop US meddling and proxy control of Ukraine, “denazify” and fully demilitarize, and agree to Ukraine’s neutrality from NATO. Oh and of course, prosecute everyone responsible for this calamity, which would include the violations of the Biological Weapons Treaty.

    This appears to be Putin’s plan. The Deep State cannot have this, as it would mean their extinction. The race to keep Trump out of office is on.

    A game of thrones.”

    Liked by 1 person

  45. Mass Psychosis
    December 14, 2023 4:40 pm

    The same Congress that just voted in favor of the intelligence community’s power to surveil American citizens without a warrant, has approved legislation preventing any president from withdrawing the U.S. from NATO without approval from the Senate or an Act of Congress.

    Liked by 1 person

  49. I am adding a short daily prayer to the board. I would invite each of you, if you wish, to also add one or maybe two of your own liking. I do not want to stifle anyone but please limit yourself to one or two religious postings. here’s one I found that I liked.

    Like

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